The Atlantic & Southern Saturday Report

Started by Judge, January 05, 2019, 03:59:09 PM

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ReadingBob

Dang those diesel engines.   >:(  They're just plain ugly compared to a steam engine and not nearly as interesting to watch given the lack of side rods and what not.  :P

I'm delighted to hear that you and your wife are well.  I'm certainly looking forward to the day we can safely gather together in Tom's shed and watch the mighty A&S in action.  It's been far too long.   :(
Bob Butts
robertbutts1@att.net

There's a fine line between Hobby and Mental Illness.

PRR Modeler

Judge i am really glad that you and Cindy are doing well.

Interesting article.
Curt Webb
The Late Great Pennsylvania Railroad
Freelanced PRR Bellevue Subdivision

jbvb

I hope everything turns out well for all.
James

BandOGuy

Your honor,
If it please the court, it would be appreciated by all of your Saturday junkie fans, if instead of skipping next Saturday's highly sought after posting, you would simply repost your personal favorite from the many tales you've regaled all of us with.
Saturday with out The Saturday Report is akin to Saturday night with no bath.
Failing this, I may have to tell my Elf on the Shelf of your grievous dereliction of duty. I know you favor steam, but this is a poor way to get coal for your passion.
Respectfully,
A Fan
Working on my second million. I gave up on the first.

ACL1504

Bill,

Good story. I think you tell the story when you had very little authority. What was your secretary's name, Ling Tee Toy?

Tom 8)
"If we are to guard against ignorance and remain free, it is the responsibility of every American to be informed."
Thomas Jefferson

Tom Langford
telsr1@aol.com

GPdemayo

Gregory P. DeMayo
General Construction Superintendent Emeritus
St. Louis & Denver Railroad
Longwood, FL

postalkarl

Hi All:

Yes I've heard of Tom's illness and I am prayer for his complete recovery.

Karl

Judge

In response to my many fans, I will try to provide a Saturday Report next Saturday.  Try tuning in sometime after 4:00 p.m. 

Judge

Saturday Report - December 5, 2020
Another beautiful day in Central Florida.  NOt a cloud in the sky and the temperature is in the low 70s. 
No formal report today because the CEO of the Atlantic & Southern Railroad is still recovering from the Covid virus, bless his heart.

However, due to popular demand, there is a story. 

                                                                                                   Shortstack Finds a Girlfriend, Part III

                                                                                                                      Four Bad Men

    After several months of scrimping and saving, Shortstack and Bonnie found a two-bedroom apartment in an old building in Tahope.  The apartment building was constructed in the 1920's during the Florida Boom and it was habitable, but definitely a fixer-upper. 
    Shortstack was getting along fine as an A&S brakeman and managed to get regular work off of the extra board. 
    One day, Shortstack was called to brake on the Sundowner, an express mixed freight that ran from Tampa to Washington, D.C., and back with a crew change in Waycross, Jaw-ja.  Shortstack rode in the cab of the lead F3 diesel to Waycross and spent the night in the railroad hotel that evening.
    The next morning, Shortstack boarded the Southbound Sunliner and took his seat behind the fireman, who asked him if he would do the favor of inspecting the engines adn perform an equipment check.  Shortstack was excited about being trusted to perform such tasks, which were the duties of the fireman.
    The Sunliner's consist that morning was two F3A units coupled with the cabs facing in the opposite directions.  This made it easy for Shortstack to walk between the units on his inspection tour.
    Shortstack walked from the cab of the lead locomotive and thoroughly inspected the diesel engine.  He checked the equipment and made sure there was a box of fusees, various tools, and an extra knuckle in case there was a problem with a coupler. 
    When he walked back from the lead unit into the trailing unit, he smelled a foul odor that rose over the normal smell of diesel oil and fuel.  As he walked towards the cab, he noticed four men lying on the floor of the locomotive.  These guys were not hobos looking for a ride.  Hobos usually rode in the boxcars.  These men were smelly, dirty, scruffy, and armed with knives and guns.  Cutthroats all!  The meanest looking of the four approached Shortstack and grabbed him by his jacket lapels.  He threatened to cut him to pieces and throw him off of the moving train unless he kept silent about their presence while they rode to their destination.
     Shortstack knew he had no chance to successfully take on these four criminals, so he hot-footed it back to the cab of the lead unit, carefully locking the entrance door behind him.  He reported the men to the engineer, who said, "If'n these guys are as bad as you say they is, we better leave them be until they reach their destination."  And so, the Southbound Sunliner EXpress rumbled on towards Sanlando in Tahope County.
    When the train arrived in Sanlando, Shortsatck climbed down from the cab to inspect the cars before the train moved on to Tampa.  As he started his walk past the engines, he saw the four bad actors standing on the passenger platform speaking friendly like to Bonnie, who was also on the platform.
    Shortstack, being justifiably concerned, approached the group to protect Bonnie from harm.  Bonnie smiled, and said, "Shortstack, come here.  I want you to meet my brother, Billy Ray, and some of his friends.  They are just in town from Tennessee.  I have invited them to stay with us for a couple of weeks.  I hope you don't mind."
    "Dang," said Shortstack, or maybe something stronger, "I wish I had met her kin afore she moved in."  Ain't love wonderful?

ReadingBob

 ;D Good one Bill!

It just occurred to me it'd be funny as all git out if a new forum member chose the handle "Shortstack" (or any one of the names of yer the other 'colorful' characters from the A&S).   ;D  ;D  ;D
Bob Butts
robertbutts1@att.net

There's a fine line between Hobby and Mental Illness.

PRR Modeler

Great story. When you marry a girl you effectively marry her family also.
Curt Webb
The Late Great Pennsylvania Railroad
Freelanced PRR Bellevue Subdivision

GPdemayo

Good one Bill.....wouldn't you think a criminal would have better hygiene so victims couldn't smell him sneaking up on them?  ;)
Gregory P. DeMayo
General Construction Superintendent Emeritus
St. Louis & Denver Railroad
Longwood, FL

Jim Donovan

I got a feeling we have not heard the last of these four desperados. Love the adventure.

Jim
Holland & Odessa Railroad

postalkarl

Hey Judge:

Glad to hear Bonnie found an apartment. Hope she enjoys it.

Karl

Judge

#854
Saturday Report - December 12, 2020

There was no meeting of the Atlantic & Southern's Board of Directors this morning due to the CEO's continued recovery from the Covid virus. 

However, there is a short story for today.  Railroaders are creatures of their time schedules.  Being on time is part of their nature.  This is a story about making up lost time.

                                                                                                            HIGH-SPEED RUNNER

    Sometime during the Second World War, one of the high-speed runners on the ACL, Russell "Ballast Scorcher" Taylor, and his fireman, Richard Tanner, were called for the daily mixed freight express that originated in Miami and terminated in Boston.  The train was powered by one of ACL's Pacifics and trailed over forty boxcars.  The consist carried tomatoes from South Florida, Strawberries and avocados from Plant City, and Oranges from Central Florida, as well as mixed freight.  Our crew's run was from Tampa to Waycross, Jaw-ja. 
    Unfortunately, due to wartime troop maneuvers, the express left Tampa thirty minutes late.  To add to the problem, the official business car, "Orlando," carrying the railroad's general manager, was coupled to the end of the train behind the caboose. 
    Engineer Taylor wanted to make up as much time as he could between Tampa and Jacksonville, but the stop in Plant City caused additional delay.  Taylor made up ten minutes by the time he reached Kissimmee, but he was still twenty minutes behind after he picked up ten loads of citrus in Orlando. When the train passed Winter Park, Taylor "opened her up" and Tanner kept the Pacific's fire hot. 
    The speed limit through Sanlando was 45mph but Taylor did not hold back on the engine as she raced through Sanlando heading for Jacksonville.  When the train arrived in Jacksonville to take on coal and water, the GM decided to climb down from his plush business car and walk to the head end.  When he reached the gangway of the locomotive, he climbed into the cab.  He acknowledged fireman Tanner and then turned to the engineer and asked, "Do you know how fast you were running when you went through Sanlando?"  The engineer looked him directly in the eye and said, "I don't know, I guess we were making about forty-five." 
    At that point, the GM's voice got louder and an octave or so higher as he authoritatively stated, "The speedometer on the back wall of the business car said you were making seventy-eight miles per hour!"
    "Well," responded Taylor, "you've got the speedometer at the wrong end of the train."
    The GM didn't say another word.  He just climbed down from the cab and walked back towards the business car.  It was all he could do to keep from laughing.

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