The Atlantic & Southern Saturday Report

[deemery]

Great story, Your Honor!


dave

[BandOGuy]

Two thumbs up, Your Honor!

[Judge]

Thanks, guys, I thought the story was whimsical enough to fit into the A&S folklore. 

[PRR Modeler]

Great story Bill.

[PaulS]

Outstanding as usual Bill !!


--Paul

[GPdemayo]

One of the funniest ever.....I can appreciate Scorcher's tactics, there are some times when you have to pour on the coal to keep to a schedule. 

[Dennis Bourey]

Bill, I loved it....Dennis

[ReadingBob]

Two thumbs up!   

[Keep It Rusty]

I'm new to reading your story's, Judge. Wonderfully written and fun to read. Thanks for sharing!

[Judge]

"Rusty" -Welcome to the Saturday Report.
 
There are now nearly sixty pages of these stories.  Since you are "new" to the Report, I will explain the Atlantic&Southern Railroad to you.  The railroad is owned by Tom Langford, a retired police lieutenant.  We lived in the same neighborhood when we were growing up in Orlando.  Tom is an amazing modeler and I mainly provide advice and support on Saturdays when we run trains.  The name "Atlantic & Southern" was selected by a character named Bixby who died many years ago. 

The railroad is located in a building in Tom's back yard.  It is a three-level layout.  The bottom layer (the Bottoms) is a storage yard with eighteen storage tracks.  The middle level (the Midlands) is a rural scene that includes the small city of Tahope and the village of Sanlando.  Tahope (the name is a corruption of the Seminole Indian word for fort) has a steam engine repair and maintenance facility, including a roundhouse. The upper level (Summit) has an urban look with a large freight yard and an extensive passenger station.  The different levels are connected by an "ovalix" which is a helix with flattened sides.  The ovalix is an engineering marvel of ten revolutions at 26 feet each and a steady one-degree grade.  The Midlands is about 90% complete and the trackwork is finished all the way from the Bottoms to Summit. The A&S is stuck in the time-frame of 1950-1951, just before steam was eliminated from Florida railroads.

The stories about the railroad are whimsical and sometimes almost funny.  Every railroad has its characters and the A&S is no exception.  While our main interests involve Florida railroading, circumstances have required us to invade our Central Florida swamp with power from foreign roads such as the Pennsy, the NC&ST.L, theL&N, the Central of Georgia (pronounced "jaw-ja"), the D&RGW, and the CB&Q.  IF you read the Reports from the beginning you will see that all of this is perfectly logical.

I hope you continue to follow the reports.  You raised my readership level to almost ten.

[Rollin]

  You raised my readership level to almost ten.

Judge, I find that hard to believe. Maybe eight, cause I'm sure most of your readers never got past grade school!

[nycjeff]

Your honor, I have just recently finished reading all of the pages of your excellent stories. They really bring the Atlantic and Southern Railroad to life. I, along with all the others, look forward to future installments of the colorful folks and history of the road.    Jeff

[Jim Donovan]

I think I will try that on my wife sometime when we are driving. Something like 'you are wrong, we are not doing 85, it is your angle of view, we are doing 58.

Jim D

[Judge]

Alas, there is still no Saturday Report due to Tom's slow recovery.  We are shooting for an abreviated board meeting next Saturday, December 26.

There is a story.  This week we will continue to follow the misadventures of Shortstack and his new girlfriend, Boxcar Bonnie.

                                                                                   Shortstack Finds a Girlfriend, Part IV - Bye, bye, Billy Ray

    Recently, we learned that Bonnie's brother, Billy Ray, and his friends from Tennessee, stowed away in the cab of the trailing diesel in the consist of the freight train Shortstack was braking.  Bonnie didn't know that Billy Ray and his buddies had just escaped from the Tennessee State Prison in Nashville.  Billy Ray was serving a twenty-five-year sentence for attempted murder (poor eyesight) and his buddies were serving long sentences for various violent offenses.  Bonnie invited her brother and his friends to stay at the apartment with Shortsack and her for the two weeks they would be in town. 
    Shortstack managed to be home only to change clothes and report back to the roundhouse for duty breaking on overnight freight trains for about a week after Billy Ray and company arrived on the scene. 
    Shortstack's luck ran out on the eighth day, which was a Saturday.  When Shortstack walked into his apartment, he saw a note from Billy Ray which said, "We gonna be a-drankin' at the Trackside Tavern with Bonnie.  Come on over there and join us." 
    This was not good news.  Billy Ray had a short temper and was known to get really mean after two or three beers.
    Shortsack changed out of his overalls and put on his blue jeans and a clean tee-shirt and walked down the street to the Trackside Tavern.  He arrived at about 9:00 p.m.  By then, the tavern was crowded with regulars, including railroaders and lumberjacks from Piney Woods.  Bonnie and her friend Crystal, were on duty as waitresses for the evening.
    Billy Ray and his friends took a table near the stage the dancers used when they entertained.  One of the railroaders said to Bonnie, "Them's the meanest, dirtiest, stinkiness SOB's I've evah seed in heah.  Only an idiot would wait on them."  "I'll wait on them," said Crystal. 
    Well, the music was loud and the girls were dancing.  Everyone was pretty much enjoying the scene until Billy Ray decided to reach over to Chrystal and grab some, which was a mistake.  Billy Ray and his three friends were out-of-towners and were tolerated by the other customers so long as they behaved.  Grabbing Chrysal was not within the conduct expected by her boyfriend, Gus Czerwonky. 
    Gus and two other railroaders approached Billy Ray and his friends to explain the accepted limits of their behavior.  One thing led to another and no one knows who threw the first blow.  One thing for sure, fhe four escaped criminals from Tennessee were no match for those three railroaders.  All four out-of-towners would up flattened on the tavern floor, after having contributed to the decorations on the ceiling. 
    The Tahope Police Department was notified of the disturbance and Officer Poovey took all four escapees into custody.  He discovrered they were escapees from Tennessee when he saw a wanted poster in the Tahope post office.  The local prosecutor decided not to file local charges when the escapees agreed to be returned to Tennessee. 
    As luck would have it, Shortstack was called to brake on Southern's Silver Crescent the next day.  Billy Ray and his buddies were shackled in the baggage car for the trip.  Shortstack ventured into the baggage car and wished them all well.  Billy Ray said, "Shortstack, I'ma gonna guess I won't be a-seein' ya for at least another twenty-five years.  But you know, if'n I had seed the blood on the ceiling in that there bar, I would have minded my manners better.  I can handle blood on the floor, but any bar with blood on the ceiling has gotta be a bad place."
    When the train eventually arrived in Nashville, Billy Ray and his fellow escapees were herded before Judge Thomas P. Chitwood to hear their fate.  Judge Chitwood noted that Billy Ray, age 30, had 20 years to go on his original sentence for attempted murder.  Judge Chitwood looked at Billy Ray's prior record and stated, "Billy Ray, your record stinks.  You've done been to prison twice in Tennessee and once in Texas.  You ain't fit to walk amongst law-abiding folks.  I sentence you to another twenty-five years in prison, the sentence to run consecutive to your other sentence."  When Billy Ray heard the judge pronounce the sentence, he was so shocked that he stepped back a step and said, "Judge, I can't do that much time."  To which Judge Chitwood said, "Just do the best you can.  Next case."

[PRR Modeler]

Anothet great story Bill.